The therapist's tendency to project his relationships

Before coming to psychotherapy, clients worry about the influence of the psychotherapist’s personality and his ability to maintain influence within the professional relationship.
It must be said that the relationship between the psychotherapist and the patient is based on several postulates.

1. Non-judgmental acceptance and friendly attitude

The goal of any professional psychotherapist is for the client, first of all, to feel comfortable and calm. This involves careful active listening, being supportive, nonjudgmental, and willing to help.

2. The specialist bases his work on the client’s values and norms

The psychotherapist relies on the norms that the client conveys, and not on generally accepted ones. Criticism of a person's values and norms and a judgmental attitude can lead to a person becoming withdrawn and unable to openly share his experiences. Then psychotherapy will be impossible, since openness is critically important in the work.
Moreover, if the client’s values and norms prevent him from functioning normally, the psychotherapist’s task is to gently influence them.

3. The psychotherapist does not give advice

Whatever the experience of a specialist, advice cannot guarantee success in a client’s unique situation, because each case is unique. In this case, advice means that the psychotherapist takes responsibility for a person’s life and prevents him from adequately perceiving the situation and developing his own personality. Advice creates a passive, superficial position, instead of actively dealing with your life and delving into it. In this case, any failures will be attributed to the psychotherapist.

4. Confidentiality and anonymity

Information obtained during therapy cannot be disclosed to third parties without prior consent. There is an exception - information that may threaten the life of the client or other people. In any case, confidentiality is a prerequisite for trust in therapy.

5. Separating personal from professional relationships

A psychotherapist cannot become a friend in the process of psychotherapy because a friend’s help is usually devalued. That is why, when there is a so-called “dual relationship” - that is, when the psychotherapist knows the client in another role, therapy is complicated. This happens because it is difficult to separate these roles and maintain a professional attitude towards work. Most often, for this reason, the psychotherapist refuses offers of therapy from close people and friends.
And now we need to talk about two important concepts that precisely reflect the influence of the client’s personalities and psychotherapy on each other.

The first is “transfer” - the client’s tendency to project relationships with loved ones (and, accordingly, the problems and conflicts that exist in them) onto the psychotherapist.

And the second is “counter-transference” - the tendency of the psychotherapist to project his significant relationships onto the client.
It is this tendency of the psychotherapist to project his relationships that is what causes concern in psychotherapeutic work.

In order to be aware of your counter-transference and skillfully apply it in therapy, it is necessary to combine therapy with the supervision of a supervisor. This is especially important for young, inexperienced specialists.
Psychotherapeutic relationships lead to the fact that the consultant and the patient begin to satisfy their needs and desires at the expense of each other. Then the objectivity and detachment necessary for effectiveness are lost.
That is why it is important to avoid such a situation. The term countertransference was first coined by Sigmund Freud. He believed that psychotherapy will advance no further than the psychotherapist's complexes and resistances will allow.
Since then, the understanding of countertransference has advanced greatly. It became apparent that countertransference could provide the therapist with very valuable information about the client. Countertransference is in many ways the key to understanding the client's unconscious processes.
There are different forms of countertransference. Objective – usually occurs during a session. And when the client leaves, then subjective countertransference appears - reactions to the client that go beyond the session. This could be anxiety, anger, sexual desire, etc.

Countertransference differs from empathy in that at the end of contact there is a break in identification with the client’s feelings. And countertransference, when handled ineptly, does not allow the patient to escape from the conflicts; accordingly, the therapist may have a desire to act out or defend himself.
This can lead to a “blind spot”, that is, an inability to see the real picture so that the story does not raise internal conflicts specialist In this case, the therapist loses sight of the correct interpretation or holds it back, justifying his reluctance. At the same time, the psychotherapist may condemn for what he cannot tolerate in himself.
Also, countertransference can cause fantasy desires in the psychotherapist that may not correspond to the client’s desires.
That is, weak conflicts of the client can provoke strong conflicts in the therapist himself.
The therapy situation itself can also prompt the psychotherapist to “save” or take the role of an admiring observer.

The tendency of the psychotherapist to project his relationships leads to the following conclusions.
1. Countertransference is a normal reaction that exists throughout therapy.
2. Can complicate therapy when the therapist does not understand his own countertransference reactions or cannot cope with them.
3. Understanding one’s countertransference helps in therapy to understand the client more deeply.
The relationship between the client and the therapist is a specific, unique relationship that helps solve problems and contributes to his personal development. They are the focus of therapy and play a key role in its success.
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