What prevents you from making a decision?

Often a client comes to me expecting me to make a choice for him.

But unfortunately, that's not what psychotherapy is for. The reality is that the responsibility for the decision you make lies with you, you are responsible for the consequences of your decisions.

The point of psychotherapeutic or coaching work is to create conditions in which you will find your solutions, and not to give ready-made template advice and solutions.
So why is it so difficult to make a decision yourself? Why is it necessary to shift responsibility to someone else?

Exclusion of alternatives - unfortunately, having chosen one, you cannot choose another)) Every “yes” automatically gives birth to a “no”. Aristotle also spoke about the difficulty of choice using the example of a dog that cannot choose one of two identical portions.

In other words, “there are people sitting at a crossroads and thinking that if they sit there for a long time, all the paths will converge into one and they will no longer need to choose.”
By choosing one thing, we automatically cut ourselves off from the other.

Wine.  Often the decision is hindered by guilt, which paralyzes the will. Bad decisions made in the past weigh you down with the realization of opportunities you never took advantage of.
Guilt blocks decisions. After all, responsibility for ourselves and our lives means that we ourselves came to this choice and are responsible for it and for our entire previous life. The torment of the fact that the right choice could have been made much earlier torments the soul.

Fear of change also prevents you from making a choice. Suppose you have made a decision, you no longer doubt and are confident in your choice. For example, working in another city involves many small decisions that are associated with big changes. To change you need to mobilize a lot of forces both inside and outside. But even with the strength, the unknown and fears may prevent the choice from being realized and paralyze actions.

You block your desires. It’s difficult to decide when you don’t know what you want.
Often people do not trust themselves and what they want, and therefore suppress what they want. You want to appear stronger and then you decide not to want what you really want. After all, this can make you defenseless or expose you. “When my desires are revealed, it will weaken me. No desires - no disappointments or rejection.
This gives rise to a serious violation - the inability to feel. This is why you need to work with a psychotherapist in order to release your feelings and restore contact with emotions.  

Take action and you will succeed!